So this very charming blog was making the rounds earlier. I laughed out loud a few times, but found it a little Euro-centric. Neither I nor anyone I know, for instance, has ever, ever said “Shall we meet- is Cihangir good for you?” Ever.
So I offer my own, highly specified, very scientifically chosen, double blind I swear, Kadiköy-specific list based on sh*t my six best girlfriends and I say over and over, in spring.
1. Can we smoke inside?
2. How long have you been here? I came here for six months (X number of) years ago.
3. So how late does that bar stay open? But yeah- have you confirmed that after they passed that dumbshit law?
4. Oh man- I just found an awesome bar- beers are six lira!
5. Well, that’s Turkey for you.
6. Have you found a Turk to help you with that?
7. Oh, you have a kindle? I have a file with, like, a thousand books in it.
8. Doesn’t your school know we have a blacklist?
9. Yeah- I was supposed to go to a birthday party tonight, but it’s all the way in Europe. Wanna go to the pub with me instead?
10. So I almost got run over in the street today. By a moped.
11. I miss being able to browse in make-up aisles.
12. I will never understand the Turkish Fear of the Draught.
13. I don’t know why I don’t spend more time in Moda Park. It always makes me happy when I go, and it’s like, four blocks from my house.
14. Yes, but does your hairdresser actually LISTEN to what you want?
15. I never saw the appeal of Orhan Pamuk, either.
16. Well, that’s what you get for Walking in Public While Being Blonde.
17. Leggings are NOT pants, oh my god, they are JUST NOT PANTS.
18. There are so many more tourists here than last year.
19. I’m living on tosts until payday.
20. What on earth do Turkish women DO in restrooms that takes so much time?!
21. I just want to go somewhere green.
22. I’m so jealous of Turkish women’s hair.
23. Angora is three lira cheaper at Migros.
24. Yeah- but he’s moving to the European side. We’ll probably never see him again.
25. Why would you want to live anywhere else?